To: Ashcraft
From: McWhertor
Re: I Like My Women Like I Like My Gamers – Covered In Fingers
https://kotaku.com/i-like-my-women-like-i-like-my-gamers-covered-in-fing-5240195
Another day, another panic-filled dozen or so posts on Kotaku, frantically hoping that Brian “Mr. Infuential” Crecente will show his face at Kotaku Towers. Ironically, the man is a mere 17 miles away from my house [[link]] right now, give or take, so he’s of closer proximity than normal. But he’s yet to make it to the [[link]] east side of Los Angeles for an impromptu employee evaluation. Bummer!
Totilo did his first posts today, ushering in a new era of brutal Totilotarianist rule. Hopefully, the whippings will decrease as time goes [[link]] on. Please pass on a “DONGS IS THE CANCER THAT IS KILLING SPENGBAB DILDOPANS” to Luke, as an apology for linking him to the Auto-Meme Generator.
https://kotaku.com/why-kotaku-5240968
Here’s what you missed.
The Beatles: Rock Band Gets The Beatles Guitars
PC Broken Steel Error Is A Games For Windows Live Problem
Crytek Helps Free Radical Realize Their Dreams
Marge Simpson Enjoys Her First Teabagging In Halo
Sega Confirms Six From Its E3 Lineup
Obama Is Latest Butt Of ‘President Evil’ Joke
EA Expects Wii MotionPlus Bundles To Help Sales, Have Little Impact On Profits
BlizzCon Tickets Go On Sale May 16, Event To Be Streamed Online
https://kotaku.com/the-beatles-rock-band-gets-the-beatles-guitars-5240592